Allowing our culture to shape our lives

This concept seems to be popping up all around me, so I thought it’d be interesting to discuss.

Yesterday I was watching The Story of Stuff and I was really struck by how much the culture influences our choices. The part that really got to me was when she talks about the way that we are pressured into buying something new even when we have a perfectly good, but older, version of the same thing at home. So, for example, I have an iPod Nano, but there’s a new one out that looks more sleek. When I’m at the gym, everyone knows that mine is the older one. It works perfectly fine. I don’t need a bigger one. Despite all of this, it is obvious to everyone that I haven’t bought a new one in a while, and I’ve had people make comments. Its ridiculous.

Most people just toss theirs in the trash when they buy a new one, and then there are all sorts of toxins and plastics that will take hundreds of years to break down, if they ever do. That doesn’t even count all of the toxins and trash that was made just to create that iPod (and the newer, sleeker one that I would have then bought). The metals and other resources in there will be completely lost, and it is all only because of pressure to change to be like everyone else and to show that I have wealth.

This morning I was watching The Independent Lens as they showed a documentary on The Men of Hula. They talk about how men did hula up until the white man came, and it was quickly shunned. People started to buy into the American idea that men shouldn’t move their hips that way and they should play football instead. It is still difficult for men who want to hula today because the culture has changed and they have lost so much of their richness as Hawaiians. There is a movement to bring back the Hawaiian culture and to stop being ashamed, but several generations now have stopped speaking Hawaiian and carrying on their special traditions just because they were told that it was a low-class activity.  It is amazing that we are willing to give up so much of our history and what makes us unique just to fit in.

The same thing happened with breastfeeding during my mom and Grandma’s time. They each faced a lot of culture pressures to do something completely unnatural (formula feed) just so that they wouldn’t look poor. Although this is getting better in some areas, this stereotype still remains for millions of women and contributes to millions of deaths. According to UNICEF, if every baby were exclusively breastfed from birth to six months, an estimated 1.3 million lives would be saved each year. Most of these babies are formula fed because the mothers feel some kind of pressure, either from medical professionals or their culture. It is so sad!

I am always amazed when I step back and look at all of the things that we blindly accept because everyone else is doing it. My great Grandfather always said that “The masses are asses.”, and I totally get what he was saying. The masses will buy into all sorts of destructive ideas just because everyone else is doing it. Its so sad, and I get sucked in just as much as everyone else does.

Really good in the end…

My rating:

I must admit that I was initially very skeptical of this book. I thought it might be punitive, guilt-based parenting in disguise, and I wrote about that in the past. The fact that the authors appeared on Family Life Today made me even more skeptical, haha. Mr. Turansky graciously responded to my criticisms, and I must humbly admit that I was wrong. I think I misjudged some of his words. I think that I can accept the things that I disagreed with once I look at them in the context of the entire book.

I would absolutely recommend this book to parents on either side of the parenting spectrum. I sincerely believe that my friends who are into punitive parenting would enjoy and learn from this book without being immediately turned off, and I think that my AP/GBD friends would love it just as much. I think it is fully in line with AP philosophy. I especially appreciated the final chapter. It focuses on how our children are not just our children, but also our brothers and sisters in Christ. I wish that more parents thought about this fact. I know that I am guilty of forgetting it very often. I was so impressed to see a mainstream Christian book that tackled this subject.

Overall, I would happily recommend this book to any parent. I even listed (and immediately sent out) my copy on paperbackswap, so that another parent could have access to this excellent resource. I am very strict about what I paperbackswap, because I would never want to send something on that I felt was not encouraging or uplifting for the family who will receive it. That is why I have a horrific copy of “Withhold Not Correction” sitting on my shelf that my mother-in-law gave me years ago. I do NOT want any other family to see someone suggest that you switch your children with a tree branch from your own yard!

Back on topic though… You can read my previous entries about Say Goodbye… on this page. If you end up reading the book, please post and let me know what you thought! I’d love to discuss it :)

Oh, and Merry Christmas!!!

See if you’ve been reported…

www.rottenneighbor.com

I find this quite hilarious. You just enter your address or zip code and then a map pops up of your neighborhood that shows all of the neighbors who have been reported for being terrible in one way or another.  My neighborhood includes a homewrecker, someone who doesn’t edge their lawn, a fighting couple, and a man who works out too early in the morning.  Check it out – and report an annoying neighbor.  ;)

D’oh!

My links were broken so no one could comment!  I’m so sorry!  It should be fixed now  :)

Win a Dyson!

I couldn’t resist entering to win a new Dyson. My poor little Dirt Devil is nearing the end of its life.

You should sign up too!

Whoa.

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America’s Most Literate Cities

America’s Most Literate Cities

Way to go, Denver!
Not only are we one of the healthiest states, but we’re quite literate as well.  I’m telling you… this is my kind of place  :)

FOXNews.com – Vegetarian Diet Melts Fat Away

FOXNews.com – Vegetarian Diet Melts Fat Away – Health News | Current Health News | Medical News

Researchers have found that people who stuck to a vegetarian diet for at least one year lost more weight than those on a standard low-fat diet. And they shed considerably more excess flab than those who didn’t stick with the meatless plan.

There’s been a lot of good press recently for vegetarian diets. The biggies last week were that a vegetarian diet reduces your risk of chronic heart disease and lowers your risk of breast cancer. Another study spoke in favor of soy, which is a big deal because soy consumption is something that a lot of non-vegetarians are worried about.

Its hip to be vegetarian ;)

FOXNews.com – Massachusetts Judge Settles Dispute by Ruling Burrito is Not a Sandwich

FOXNews.com – Massachusetts Judge Settles Dispute by Ruling Burrito is Not a Sandwich – Local News | News Articles | National News | US News

“A sandwich is not commonly understood to include burritos, tacos and quesadillas, which are typically made with a single tortilla and stuffed with a choice filling of meat, rice, and beans,” Locke wrote in a decision released last week.

Thank goodness that we have judges around so that such matters can be resolved!

Is it really a “deeper look” at heart issues?

So, I’m still plugging through Turansky and Miller’s Say Goodbye to Whining… and I am growing a bit more disappointed with each chapter. Its such a bummer.  This is a book that I wanted to love.  It is on the mainstream Christian radar, and I would love for a GBDish book to be out there that didn’t even have to address spanking.  After all, spanking is not the issue.
So I love the way that they say to get to the heart of issues.  I couldn’t agree more.

If you discipline your child to change behavior but a bad attitude remains, then discipline is incomplete…  Step back and ask yourself, “Why is this child struggling with a bad attitude?”  This will help you focus your discipline.  One mom recognized that her five-year-old son needed more sleep…

and so on and so forth.  You get the idea.  They are trying to get to the heart of the issue and not leave their children with a seething anger.  Fabulous!  I agree!

And then, out of nowhere…

“Mary, I’d like you to go and clean up the toys in your room.”

“But Moommmm!” Mary says yet again, rolling her eyes and huffing off to her room.

“Mary, come here, please.  I can tell you’re having a bad attitude by your tone of voice.  If you can’t obey with a good attitude, then I’m going to give you another job when you’re done with this one.  Now I’d like to hear a different response.”

Hunh?  That really sounds like dealing with the heart of the issue.  They seem to contradict themselves over and over!  So far, I’d still say this book has more good than bad, but it may be more of a “gateway drug” than a full leap to a grace based life.  It sort of bridges the gap, but is not firmly in either camp.

Oh well, I’ll keep you up to date on my readings  ;)